I really can't hide how painful it was to lose a friend like him.
The other day, I went home to our Province so that I can attend his last night (A traditional nites of a Filipino Funeral wherein there was sounds, music, foods.etc) I forced my parents to permit me to do so, I really have a lot of regrets when he's still alive and I don't want that until his wake, I can't show my love for him. Even that I still have sore throats and lessons to study for my exams next week, I am willing to sacrifice just for him. It doesn't matter anymore if I was physically and emotionally wasted, all I want is to see him.
Yesterday, we already sent him where everyone would have to build their own room, at the cemetery. I also introduced myself to his mother, his girlfriend and and even his close friends. Almost all of them heard about our stories, about me, about my cousins as well. O yea, he's really talkative because all of them knew about or friendship.
I tried to gain strength and a little courage so that, I want to show him that I am happy for him but when you already there, walking, taking pictures and seeing him on one last glance, its really heart breaking. I didn't control myself to show how painful it was. I was also affected by the reason that my cousins were not here to give support to each of us that is also suffering for his loss. I didn't have a chance to see his closest and best friends (Kuya Joseph, Joel and his cousin Kuya Archie) on the cemetery, maybe they just didn't want to send him in that situation. I also had a chance to meet them even his Laguna friends.
Don't worry my dear, we will try our best to smile again. You are the one that will make hard situations into lighter one and we will continue to inspire each other all the learnings that you brought to us.
Be an angel to us. You will always be in my heart. Friends forever!!!!!
